NARAS TEMABLE DE FANTASMAS E OTRA COSAS

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Ep.7 “Mense de miscas”

La casa es un loca como no otra. Esta es an plu vera si on abita la stomaco de un monstro. Tal ia es la caso de Teresa de ci sua aparte ia es engolida par alga spesie de basilisco e Teresa ia deside ce lo ta es plu fasil simple continua abita ala ca atenta trova un loca nova en esta economia.

There is no place like home. That’s especially true if you live inside a monster’s stomach. Such was the case of Teresa whose apartment got swallowed up by some sort of basilisk and she decided it was easier to just keep living there than find a new place in this economy.

- Mm, me deveni fame, - Teresa ia pensa. - Lo es tro mal ce on no trae piza a asi, a la loca a do la basilisco ia vaga oji. Oce, lo es la tempo per esamina la posta.

- Man, I’m getting hungry, - thought Teresa. - It’s too bad they don’t deliver pizza here, to wherever this basilisk has wandered off to today. Well, time to check the mail.

El ia abri sua porte xef, ia fa un paso a la surfas aderente de la stomaco orible de la basilisco e ia regarda en la caxa de posta improvisada cual el ia instala prosima a la esofago. La slogan de la ajenteria de posta de SUA es “No neva, no pluve, no caldia, no sombria de note impedi esta mesajores de un completi rapida de sua cursos asiniada” e, con grasias a dio, los ia es multe seria sur esta car Teresa ancora ia reseta posta asi, en la basilisco.

She opened her front door, stepped onto the sticky surface of basilisk’s horrible stomach and checked the makeshift mailbox she had set up near the esophagus. The motto of the US Postal Service is “Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these couriers from the swift completion of their appointed rounds”. And good lord do they mean it because Teresa still got mail here inside the basilisk.

- O, cual es esta? - Teresa ia dise regardante un postereta longa.

- Oh, what’s this? - said Teresa looking at a long flyer.

Lo ia es un menu de un pizeria. “Nos trae a cualce loca, - lo ia dise. - an a locas bizara temable e nonpensable. A simple la locas la plu mal nos va ariva con un piza calda e fresca per vos, ave an no ansia sur esta.”

It was a menu for a pizza parlor. “We deliver anywhere, - it said, - even weird terrible unthinkable places. Just the worst places we’ll show up with a hot fresh pizza for you, don’t even worry about it.”

- Ha! - Teresa ia dise. - Serta on ia envia esta comersial a la seniora coreta. La fortuna surie a tota de nos en esta dia.

- Huh! - said Teresa. - Well, they definitely sent this ad to the right lady. Surely fortune smiles upon us both this day.

El ia revade a la aparte e ia telefoni la numero sur la postereta.

She made her way back into her apartment and dialed the number on the flyer.

- Piza, - la vose en la linia ia dise. - Tu vole esta?

- Pizza, - said a voice on the line. - You want it?

- A… Si. Si, - Teresa ia dise. - Me vole esta. Piza, per dise.

- Ah… Yeah. Yes, - said Teresa. - I do want it. The pizza that is.

- Bon. Nos ariva pronto, - la vose ia dise e instante algun ia bate a la porte.

- Great. We’ll be right there, - said the voice and then there was a knock at her door.

El ia ta pensa ce lo es suprastrana ma recorda: Teresa vive en un mundo do basiliscos come apartes e la abitores a alga veses simple continua abita ala. Con rapidia e famia grande Teresa ia abri la porte. Ante se con piza calda fresca el ia vide Satan.

She would have thought this was super strange but remember: Teresa lives in a world where basilisks eat apartments and then the tenant sometimes just keeps living there. With great speed and hunger Teresa swung open the door. Standing there in front of her holding a hot fresh pizza was Satan.

- Alo, me es Satan, - la re de demones ia dise. - Tu pote reseta esta piza par intercambia per tua alma.

- Hey, I’m Satan, - said the demon king. - You could have this pizza for your soul.

Teresa ia regarda la piza e regarda Satan denova.

Teresa looked at that pizza and then back up at Satan.

- No, - el ia dise. - Lo es un compra vera mal.

- No, - she said. - That’s a really bad deal.

Teresa ia clui la porte e en loca de piza el ia coce a se alga macaroni con ceso.

Teresa shut the door and then made herself some macaroni and cheese instead.